Another Week Down

I didn't post earlier because I was very busy but I did lose 2 more pounds this week. So I have 36lbs to lose. Although I have been looking at my body and thinking I will just make this sort of my Short Term goal, I am thinking I will probably need to lose about 15-20lbs more to get to a real GOAL! So if I lose all that I will pretty much be at 100lbs of weight loss. I have been really hard on myself this week. I HATE hate HATE that I have gotten so fat. I was sitting looking at myself in my XXL sweat pants, and I looked at my husband and said " Its sad that these used to fit" he looked confused and said "don't you mean happy?" I had to explain that yes I am happy that I am losing weight but sad that I was so fat! These pants just hang off me now they used to be like a more fitted fleece yoga pant, its what I live in now days, I look 10x bigger than I am but why would I buy clothes when I am weekly dropping weight? In one month I could lose 12lbs and I can not keep buying clothes. I did recently buy a super cute outfit and its a little snug, well it was a lot snug 2 weeks ago and now its feels just a slight snug and I bet in 1-2 weeks it will fit perfect! I have to have things to treat myself when I hit goals, I am just a few lbs from losing 50! When I hit that I will take pictures and get something non food related! So far things have been great, I am losing weekly and I feel great! I am pretty sure I have added years on to my life.

The Story

Today I weigh in early due to being a girl! Basically when its that special time my body will not show the weight loss.. It hoards my water weight so I weigh in before this happens! 2lbs lost this week! I only have 38lbs to go ! Started out at 83lbs to lose and 15weeks later I am at 38lbs.
  So Why is this girl so fat? Why does she get thin and get fat? ( Go ask Oprah) hee hee Just kidding. Well as a child I had an awful life. My dad did drugs and my mom was just too young to have me and my brother. The things I had to see, the fact that my mother used treats as rewards just really gave me the wrong impression of food. If she was depressed we went to get donuts or cupcakes. I was also on prednisone because my parents were not very cleanly, and I had really bad asthma and so I was on the machine and taking medicine quite a bit. My poor knees could not even take the weight when I hit 8th grade and I was at 200lbs I ended up in knee braces for a while. Anywho you know you get older and get the big picture and I learned how to take care of myself, and get that weight off. Then married into the military and MANY times just ate my problems away! Although right now I am doing great I could relapse after losing it.. I hate that. Food really is an addiction. Especially for people who have just a wide range of issues. Right now I am super strong and I feel like I need to get healthy and I hope that I can keep that up. I need to be healthy for my kids, I need to be a great example for them, no treats like cupcakes we have treats like homemade fruit roll ups, or I hand make things and can omit a lot of sugar and crap. Treats are not given for good behavior, treats are just a treat when we want a little treat! Basically I have to trick my brain and get it out of that old way of thinking. Now it has gotten a bit sick, I almost hate myself for eating anything. When I eat something I think about how many calories is this, should I be eating right now, I usually just eat half or less than half of everything. I realize this could be a problem too, but I am eating, I do hit my calorie goals and lets face it I have a ton of weight to lose. I am tired of being fat. I am still fat when I look in the mirror. I loathe the fat stomach that I see, and nothing looks good on me. There will always be a life long battle of this thinking. When I Was fat I never looked in the mirror and I NEVER took pictures of myself. Now I can look at my face and I see changes its just not how I want to look.

Another Day!

After my 3lbs weight loss last week my weekend was a little on the BAD side! Although I got some good exercise in I did partake in some not so good food! Like Yates Cider mill Donuts and cider! I only had one donut and about 4oz of the cider but I had a few other pit falls like Wine (I love a good red wine) and french fries! I thought I could just eat 6 fries and that was it but they were homemade they were sooo good! So Bad weekend but Monday I started fresh and new and that's how the cookie crumbles! If I ate good all the time this would just not work. This does account for my wide range of weight loss from 1-3lbs if I am REALLY good I can get a 3lbs weight loss if I am not so good I can expect to lose 1 lbs probably meaning I gained back 2 lbs and then lost 1 lbs later in the week LOL. I have always battled with my weight, 10 years old I was fat and it just sort of escalated from there I was probably about 215lbs in high school when I decided to do something and although I never weighed myself I went from a size 18 to a size 10 so I lost some serious weight I looked awesome and kept it off until I got pregnant, even after pregnancy I dropped a ton of weight and then I must have been like 260lbs when she hit a year old. I had to buy Men's XXL sweatpants... I dropped down to 230 and got pregnant with my son about a year later and then I dropped a TON of weight after I had him and put it all back on until he hit 2 and I got serious. I lost 50lbs and was in a size 14 no not skinny but I looked great! I kept that off for a year and gained it all back, got pregnant again and put on another 33lbs.. So this time around I have 83lbs just to get to that size 14 weight, although this time once I hit my goal I will not just stop! I will continue doing everything I do now except I will knock down my work out to 3x a week instead of 5. That way I hopefully can maintain and maybe lose a few lbs here and there over the months. My goal is probably unlike most, everyone wants to be skinny, lots of people get to that point but I like a little weight on myself, I just want to be healthy. Curvy yet healthy. Eating should be healthy AND tasty!

Weigh In

Fridays are generally my weigh in days except if I go to the Dr. and get weighed by her. I only weigh in 1x a week though. This is a MUST! Seriously I have weighed myself more and my weight fluctuates up to 5lbs! That's quite a bit of difference. Anyway today brought my weight loss to 43lbs! So if you do the math I have lost a total of 3lbs this week!  WOO HOO! I am going to say this is probably due to my added strength training this week. I thought I would bring a quick little recipe over here it is a Treat because everyone has a sugar tooth and you need treats.. You will FAIL if you take all treats away.


Faux Ice Cream Sandwich

2 Vanilla pizzelles
2 Tablespoons Reddi whip

Put Reddi Whip on one cookie and then sandwich the other one on top (don't squish) place in freezer for 20 minutes and pull it out and enjoy! This little treat is about 65 calories and less than 3 grams of sugar!

Not a diet a Lifestyle change

So I was going to make this into my MI eats everywhere blog, but shortly after I started this I started my lifestyle change! Last week I hit my 40lbs mark. Tomorrow will be week 14. So Daily I am going to come on share my strengths and falls (We all have them) and share my progress! It seems like everywhere I go when I tell people I have lost weight they want to know how I do it! All I can say is I wish I could tell them I sit on my behind and eat chocolate cookies everyday and the weight just melted off! Lets face it everyone wants the miracle diet and there just is not one. I work my behind off everyday, I focus on what goes into my  body and I am always thinking of new ways to make the next day better. I still have 43lbs to go do not get me wrong. I am a big girl, I have a lot of weight to lose but I think I have a lot to offer! Especially since I have a thyroid disorder and it makes life that much harder! The week I step on the scale and I lost nothing it was heart breaking, but you go in and visit your Dr. and learn your numbers are off! I changed my meds and lost 4lbs the next week! All I can say is go in, get a physical and talk with your Dr. What is a good weight loss for you? My Dr. said at my age I can lose 3lbs a week safely! That does not mean I will lose that amount of weight, in fact most weeks its 1-2lbs which is normal, especially for a lifestyle change! This week I added extensive strength training as I looked at myself really well in the mirror and seen some sag in the arms and the belly! GREAT weight loss, boo for saggy skin! Heavy weights, and push ups, sit ups, and leg ups! I have to work all parts of my body. Although after having 2 children one 10lbs and one 11lbs and then a 3rd oddball at 7 lbs sad to say my stomach will never be the same as it was before babies came! But my fat has a story and everyone's does! I do not want to be skinny, I want to be healthy. I love my curves, I am not ugly but too much of anything is never a good thing.